Our parents love us because we are their children, and this is an unalterable fact, so that we feel more safe with them than with anyone else. In times of success this may seem unimportant, but in times of failure it affords a consolation and a security not to be found elsewhere.
Source: Bertrand Russell: The Conquest of Happiness, 1930, Chap.11:Zest
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The basis of love in romantic relationships is quite different from that in parent-child relationships.
When we are young, even in a mutually loving relationship, romantic feelings can fade rapidly if we no longer find the other person as attractive as before, or if someone more attractive appears before us. However, as the relationship grows longer and both partners come to know each other well, they usually do not separate easily, even if they no longer feel as much attraction to one another.
In contrast, the nature of the parent-child relationship is quite different. Parents and children love each other not because of one another's attractiveness, but simply because "parents love us because we are their children," and conversely, "we children love our parents because they are our parents."
This is usually taken for granted and not consciously noticed, but it is, in fact, a very important truth.
As Bertrand Russell also says in "Today's Words of Russell”
“We feel more safe with them than with anyone else. In times of success this may seem unimportant, but in times of failure it affords a consolation and a security not to be found elsewhere.”
Of course, this comes with the condition that the parents are decent people. It is entirely natural for a child to feel no love for a parent who is abusive.
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